three in the morning productions

faith

GOD. What a chewy topic.

I'm currently discussing the merit of religion with an old friend, but find that it's difficult to say anything without stepping on touchy toes. It's not religion that works, he says, it's God. Funny. That at one long point I was a zealous "God-goer", spouting epistles of faith. So now the tables have turned, though there is nothing that could ever make me go back. To label me, I would be agnostic; no, better yet, non-religious affiliated--as a matter of fact, I distrust religion immensely. For thousands of years, religion has been an implement for the ruling hands to manipulate the masses and to further their political agendas. The Crusades, the Spanish Inquisition, St. Bartholomew's Day Massacre are just a few of your lovely examples.

But how can you say that, you're a preacher's kid! And... that guarantees my God-automaton-ess? On the contrary, my parents have used religion to hold me under rigid compliancy. What they don't realize is that it pushes me further away from their God and provokes me to a rebellion. I don't need religion to respect them. My love for my family is a given, with or without God. Nearly sixteen fucking years of living my life under the fear of hell, and now when they use it as a goadstick I become infuriated. Because I cannot conceive of a loving, forgiving Father who would allow his children to burn in eternal damnation.

The thing with religion is that you must allow yourself to be moved, or in other words, compel yourself to feel something. Under Christianity, I became deadened spiritually. Revivals were a joke. I'd sit through them and force myself to blink out tears, even imagine myself to have felt a presence brush at me. Oho, they're not kidding when they say the Holy Ghost is inside you. He, the Holy One, exists only if I allow Him the spiritual grounds to thrive. You see? God is nothing more than a concept carried on by His followers. In my world--in my reality and in my sphere of Self, God is dead. I am God.

Agreed. I’m more than sure that it works for others because I’ve witnessed it in so many people around me--people who needed a reason for their existence, people who needed something to cling to and undoubtedly God has His awesome powers. That’s what religion is, a tool, a crutch, and a panacea against life. It has its side effects as well, particularly fanaticism. Take a good friend of mine for example. She once wallowed in the pits of dispair with me and ever since she found The Light, I must say that I miss her company. Religion will always breed fanatics and fanatics are equivalent of Bad, very bad. Close-minded people who will not give anyone of a different opinion the time of day amuses me. She amuses me. 'Right, I'm nodding my head, I'm listening to what you have to say but God is Truth and Truth is God, no buts or questions about it.' How long will this phase of hers last? When will this phase of mine be through?

Call it woman's intuition
But I think I'm onto something here
Temporaryism has been the black plague
and the Jesus of Our Age

I know that I sound opinionated
Maybe biased and quite possibly jaded
But sooner or later they'll be throwing
quarters at you on stage

Ooh who are you
When will you be through
Yeah, it's just a phase
It will be over soon
Yeah it's just a phase

And I'm waiting for it to be over too yeah

~ Just a Phase (Incubus)

06.19.02 - 9:47 p.m.

	faith GOD. What a chewy topic. I'm currently discussing the merit of religion with an old friend, but find that it's difficult to say anything without stepping on touchy toes. It's not religion that works, he says, it's God. Funny. That at one long point I was a zealous "God-goer", spouting epistles of faith. So now the tables have turned, though there is nothing that could ever make me go back. To label me, I would be agnostic; no, better yet, non-religious affiliated--as a matter of fact, I distrust religion immensely. For thousands of years, religion has been an implement for the ruling hands to manipulate the masses and to further their political agendas. The Crusades, the Spanish Inquisition, St. Bartholomew's Day Massacre are just a few of your lovely examples. But how can you say that, you're a preacher's kid! And... that guarantees my God-automaton-ess? On the contrary, my parents have used religion to hold me under rigid compliancy. What they don't realize is that it pushes me further away from their God and provokes me to a rebellion. I don't need religion to respect them. My love for my family is a given, with or without God. Nearly sixteen fucking years of living my life under the fear of hell, and now when they use it as a goadstick I become infuriated. Because I cannot conceive of a loving, forgiving Father who would allow his children to burn in eternal damnation. The thing with religion is that you must allow yourself to be moved, or in other words, compel yourself to feel something. Under Christianity, I became deadened spiritually. Revivals were a joke. I'd sit through them and force myself to blink out tears, even imagine myself to have felt a presence brush at me. Oho, they're not kidding when they say the Holy Ghost is inside you. He, the Holy One, exists only if I allow Him the spiritual grounds to thrive. You see? God is nothing more than a concept carried on by His followers. In my world--in my reality and in my sphere of Self, God is dead. I am God. Agreed. I’m more than sure that it works for others because I’ve witnessed it in so many people around me--people who needed a reason for their existence, people who needed something to cling to and undoubtedly God has His awesome powers. That’s what religion is, a tool, a crutch, and a panacea against life. It has its side effects as well, particularly fanaticism. Take a good friend of mine for example. She once wallowed in the pits of dispair with me and ever since she found The Light, I must say that I miss her company. Religion will always breed fanatics and fanatics are equivalent of Bad, very bad. Close-minded people who will not give anyone of a different opinion the time of day amuses me. She amuses me. 'Right, I'm nodding my head, I'm listening to what you have to say but God is Truth and Truth is God, no buts or questions about it.' How long will this phase of hers last? When will this phase of mine be through? Call it woman's intuition But I think I'm onto something here Temporaryism has been the black plague and the Jesus of Our Age I know that I sound opinionated Maybe biased and quite possibly jaded But sooner or later they'll be throwing quarters at you on stage Ooh who are you When will you be through Yeah, it's just a phase It will be over soon Yeah it's just a phase And I'm waiting for it to be over too yeah ~ Just a Phase (Incubus) 06.19.02 - 9:47 p.m.